Managing stress at work

A trauma-informed, somatic approach.

Photographs: Pexels

Text: Fiona L Smith

Moving to Denmark is often seen as a dream opportunity: the famous hygge, a healthy work-life balance, generous parental leave, and a culture that prioritises well-being. But as we’ve seen in the #theforgottengold series, finding a job isn’t always straightforward, and once you have one, the pressure to ‘get it right’ can be huge. Many internationals experience unexpected stress at work.

Navigating a new language, unspoken social norms, and the pressure to perform can create significant stress, especially if previous experiences have sensitised your nervous system to anxiety, uncertainty, or feeling like an outsider.

A trauma-informed, somatic approach offers not only a more empowering perspective but also tools for lasting support and resilience.

Why traditional stress management may not be enough

Typical stress management tools - time management, exercise, meditation, and mindset work - can be helpful. But if you’re constantly overwhelmed, experiencing symptoms like physical tension, migraines, gut issues, or falling into deeper patterns of people-pleasing, perfectionism, or fear of failure, surface strategies may not address the root causes.

From a trauma-informed perspective, stress isn’t just about today’s challenges - it’s shaped by survival patterns learned over a lifetime. If you grew up feeling unsafe or unseen, with inconsistent or critical parenting, have experienced bullying, or lived through financial insecurity, your nervous system may have adapted by staying on high alert. These seemingly small experiences can leave a lasting impact, just like more obvious traumatic events. In a new country and workplace, where everything feels unfamiliar, old patterns can easily resurface, making ordinary stresses feel overwhelming.

Understanding this can be incredibly liberating. You’re not failing or bad at coping - your body is doing its best to protect you based on what it learned before.

We can’t think our way out of stress - The 80:20 rule

Around 80% of information about our environment and experience travels from the body to the brain via the Vagus nerve; only 20% travels the other way. Physiology beats mindset every time, so instead of trying to think or reason our way out of stress, we need to feel our way into safety and resilience. Somatic (body-based) practices work directly with your nervous system, helping you regulate and, over time, rewire your stress responses.

"Grounding & safety: make sure your feet have firm contract with the ground."

1. Learn to track your nervous system states

You might find yourself struggling to ‘fit in’ to Denmark’s seemingly relaxed, egalitarian work culture, worrying about being too direct, too ambitious, or not ‘Danish enough.’

Start by noticing how your body feels in different situations. Are there moments of tightness in your chest, a clenching in your gut, shaky legs, or a sense of numbness? These are clues to your nervous system state - whether you're edging into fight/flight (hyperarousal) or freeze (hyperarousal).

Awareness is the first step to change.

2. Prioritise ‘micro-moments’ of regulation

You don’t need a 30-minute meditation break to regulate stress. Focus on small practices you can weave into your day:

Grounding & safety: Make sure your feet have firm contact with the ground. Use yoga blocks or books if needed. Press your feet into the floor during meetings or place a cushion or weighted blanket on your lap during Zoom calls.

Orientating: Take regular screen breaks and let your eyes slowly scan the room, noticing colours and textures. This signals to your brain that you’re safe.

Breath awareness: Take a slow, extended exhale as if blowing through a straw. Empty your lungs completely before gently breathing in. Repeat a few times.

These simple actions can interrupt a stress cycle before it builds up.

3. Work with boundaries, gently

Many internationals feel pressure to prove themselves, but overworking or saying yes to everything can actually work against you here.

If setting boundaries feels uncomfortable - perhaps due to past criticism, rejection, or exclusion – start small: Say, “Can I get back to you on that?” instead of immediately agreeing to something. Feel your feet on the floor or place a hand on your body for support. Over time, your nervous system will learn that setting boundaries is safe, rather than a threat.

4. Build a sense of belonging in your body

Loneliness and isolation can be major stressors for internationals in Denmark. While building external connections takes time, you can also cultivate belonging internally.

Practice self-contact: Put a hand on your chest or belly and notice the warmth, pressure, and support. Or do the same with a self-hug: Put one hand around your body, on your ribcage, and the other over the opposite arm or shoulder, and gently squeeze or stroke. Notice the body soften and calm.

Our internal sense of belonging becomes an anchor, especially when external belonging feels slow to arrive.

Be kind to yourself

Working with the body is important, but so is how we speak to ourselves. Offering encouragement, patience, and understanding if things don't go well helps shift the nervous system towards greater resilience and safety.

Support matters – develop your network of people navigating similar experiences or reach out for mentorship, leadership coaching, or somatic therapy - each can play a role at different stages.

Managing stress in a new work environment isn’t a one-off task; it’s a journey. And you're not meant to do it alone. Every step you take towards connection, with yourself and others, helps build the foundations for a thriving life and career here.